The house is officially on Baby Red Alert for little Rizzle to make her appearance. As of 37 weeks I am 3cm dilated. For the first time this pregnancy, I feel as though I've stumbled upon something new. Being induced at 38 weeks with PX, with absolutely no dilation and sky-high blood pressure, left me without the typical pregnancy ending; I have no experience with spontaneous labor, little idea as to how to time contractions, and just a sliver more first-hand experience with pain relief techniques. Being confined to a bed and only allowed to labor on my side doesn't leave a lot of options available. I may have mastered the visualization/relaxation/meditation techniques but that is it.
In essence, I feel like a first time mom.
I am excited and scared at the thought my water could break at any moment. I've spent the day running around packing bags, making lists, trying to get organized. My nights are full of pouring over any information on labor signs, timing contractions, laboring positions, warning signs. I must invest in some Visine before my eyeballs turn to dust and poof out of my skull. I'm sure Daddy Drax thinks I have completely lost it to be rereading our birthing class materials but I honestly feel clueless at this point.
My midwife and OBs keep reminding me labor is labor, it'll feel the same so I will know, but being constantly monitored by wires and nurses left me little time to focus on all the little pieces that make up early labor. My recollection of PX's birth doesn't much start till after my midwife broke my water and I hit 5cm. The rest is a blur of blood pressure readings, talking to Daddy Drax, and trying to find something entertaining on the boob tube. Perhaps this will work in my favor and keep me from spending pointless hours in the hospital during early labor. Perhaps this is a blessing in disguise.
Hmm, perhaps. But it still won't keep me from worrying all night that my water will break when I go to roll over.